You were not hired to have all the answers

"I don't know if I know enough yet to contribute, but…"

That was my client on a call with her boss. She said it twice in 35 minutes. She almost said it a third time, and then she caught herself. She literally said out loud to herself, "I have to stop saying that."

She found herself saying this even though she has over 20 years of experience. She recently made a brave leap to a new company and four months into a senior leadership role at a new organization, she found herself second-guessing whether she knew enough to speak up.

So many of my high-achieving clients carry this pattern. They were deep experts in their previous roles because they were the person in the room who could answer any question or know exactly who to go to to find the answer. This feels good! It's a dopamine hit when you have all the answers. Our brain basically lights up and tells us we are valuable because we are experts with answers. 

But then they step into a new role, a new organization, or a new industry and suddenly they DON'T have all the answers. Of course, instead of recognizing the unique gifts they DO bring, the only thing their brain screams at them is everything they don't know or haven't figured out yet. 

This doesn't feel good, so it's tempting then to go down rabbit holes and dig into details that aren't yours to own. I see clients get over-involved in things that pull them off track. Mostly, they set this high bar for what “knowing enough” looks like. It might sounds like,

“Once I understand this, then I'll feel like an expert. Once I know that, then I can contribute.”

But there's no “there” there. You learn a little bit more and that bar keeps moving higher. Great leaders are not hired to know all the answers, instead, they learn to ask the right questions. 

So we we explored this, what does enough knowing actually look like right now? 

     She knew strategy planning and execution. 

     She asked the right questions for long-term thinking. 

     She understood how to encourage people to adopt changes. 

     She understood how innovation rolls out. 

     She understood power dynamics and how to get stakeholders on board.

She realized that the best leaders she's ever observed knew just enough to be dangerous. They know enough to ask the right questions. But they also know enough to have really good people around them. They don't create an expertise bottleneck where everybody's waiting on them for all the answers.

So instead of asking, "Do I know enough yet?" she started asking a different question, “What situations call for the unique talents that I bring (where I am already enough), and what actions will I take?”

🔥 Where in your career are you waiting to feel like an expert before you speak up? What if you already bring exactly what that situation needs and it has nothing to do with knowing all the details?

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PUT THIS IDEA INTO ACTION

The tricky thing about waiting to feel like enough is that it keeps you playing small in the exact moments where your unique gifts are needed most. Here are some strategies to boost your confidence in the moments it matters:

1. Define what enough looks like right now. Not someday but in this season of your career. What do you actually need to know to add value? Is it detailed expertise or is it leading through ambiguity, coaching and developing people, asking good questions versus having all of the right answers? 

2. Name the 2 or 3 gifts you bring that have nothing to do with being the subject matter expert. 

Maybe it's strategy or asking the right questions. Maybe it's bringing rigor and structure where there is none. Maybe it's understanding how to bring people along through change. These are your foundational gifts that transfer everywhere.

3. Ask yourself, what is NOT mine to be an expert in? When you hear the temptation to dig into details that aren't yours to own, catch it. What actions, projects and energy will serve your best and highest use?

TRY THIS NEXT: 

The next time you catch yourself thinking "I don't know if I know enough," pause and ask yourself:

• What do I know about me and my talents and gifts in this situation? 

• How do I want to show up? 

• What is actually mine to ask/say or NOT mine to say?

Kelli Thompson is an award-winning author, keynote speaker, and executive coach who specializes in helping high achievers advance to influential leaders in their organizations. She is the author of the critically acclaimed book, Closing The Confidence Gap: Boost Your Peace, Your Potential & Your Paycheck.

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